He was being played when he first met a beautiful, inquisitive and upbeat doctor during a singles trip, K.G., a 42-year-old Manhattan-based risk consultant for banks, had no idea. (He asked that just their initials be utilized for privacy reasons.)

Most Widely Used Today

April 16, 2014 | 8:23pm

“She masked the ‘take men for what you will get’ mentality therefore well,” he recalls — at the very least at very first.

“She didn’t carry among those handbags when you look at the crook of her supply, she wasn’t tipping over with jewelry — all those telltale indications.”

But after a couple weeks of dating, warning flags begun to appear: She refused to dine at midpriced restaurants, so when she invited him off to a bar to meet up with her pals, he had been likely to select the tab up for her 14 buddies.

Matchmaker Janis Spindel

“My girlfriend said, ‘Why don’t you purchase products for everybody?’”

During the period of per year of dating, there have been extravagant trips to European countries and, on her birthday celebration, he splurged on a Cartier view.

However when his birthday celebration rolled around five months later on, he had been addressed to a “mediocre” restaurant, sans present.

So when their buddies told him that she’d been cheating on him, he decided he’d had sufficient.

“She simply desired anyone to give her so she wouldn’t need to work,” he claims on representation. “She had been good in some recoverable format — attractive, had her profession — but she had her goals that are own.

“I happened to be therefore depressed with it all,” he adds.

Gold diggers are this type of nagging issue in NYC, one girl has put up a company that proclaims it's going to weed them down.

Upper East Side matchmaker Janis Spindel founded Club J-Love in 1993 — and since then claims to possess 1,008 marriages under her gear. Her specialty? Helping guys like K.G. avoid heartbreak — as well as the loss in hard-earned money — by sussing away a woman’s real motives.

“I'm able to smell a silver digger from a mile away,” says Spindel, whom claims she rejects about 10 percent of all of the those vying for a place in her own 3,000-member stable of beauties. “It’s why clients that are[my arrived at me — to protect them from bimbettes and silver diggers.”

Based on Spindel, silver diggers are really a growing issue, given that the town is awash in “more money” — from Wall Street to hedge funds to startups. And thus she vets each girl in person, grilling each one of these with a number of pointed questions directed at determining whether she’s a great 10 — or perhaps a 49er in disguise.

Kimberly vs. Amanda

“My consumers have to know that the ladies are upscale, expert individuals and additionally they have a work — they don’t actually care exactly what the work is, nonetheless they need to have a genuine work,” says Spindel, whose male clients fork over upward of $50,000 to participate her matchmaking service.

Therefore, how can you differentiate a woman that is well-intentioned the people whom simply actually, really like talking about your wallet?

Not just if the girl have work, claims Spindel, but a sizable earnings — six numbers is anticipated. She must also be independent and real time alone.

It is it certainly as easy as that? All things considered, numerous well-intentioned females want to align on their own with effective, effective males, too.

For Robin Kassner, a 30-something CEO of her very own company, Haute PR, her future husband’s wallet, like his heart, can't ever be too large.

“As a fruitful girl, I’m hunting for someone of my caliber — not some schlump from the street, but some one since effective as me — or higher.”

The flaxen-haired vixen is heaving with desire, and has now the decolletage-baring dresses to show it.

“I would like to get from a primary Avenue princess to a Park Avenue princess,” claims the UES singleton, who's unequivocal about her choosy checklist. “I’m to locate a perfect 10 — someone who’s 5 in the appearance scale with $5 million when you look at the bank.”

She earns within the top one percent, but she’s perhaps maybe not thinking about a parasite who’s maybe maybe not making his or her own continue.

“Some individuals may phone me a silver digger, but I call myself a goal digger — I’m goal-oriented, We have a lifestyle that is really nice but i would like a husband who is able to go me to the next taxation bracket, together. There’s no shame within my game.”

“There are positively some ladies who are demonstrably gold diggers — extremely dedicated to attempting to live a particular types of life they can accomplish on their own or don’t want to accomplish on their own — and finding these men is the answer,” says Manhattan-based relationship therapist Rachel Sussman that they don’t think.

“There are other women that do have careers and ambition, nevertheless they have that dream of dating an individual who works on Wall Street or makes more income them a more interesting life than they do, and [that this] will give. I'dn’t necessarily phone that girl a gold digger.”

Jess vs. Robin

What exactly is clear is the fact that in terms of relationships in NYC, cash speaks.

“once you ask dudes their biggest issue dating when you look at the town, they complain that most ladies simply want rich dudes. Rich dudes are guarded and possess a wall surface up, and not-wealthy dudes feel they’re getting passed over simply because they don’t make sufficient money.”

Sussman also hears gripes from health practitioners and solicitors lamenting they don’t rake in sufficient dough.